Every Harvard class should have one Democrat to rescue it from oblivion.
There is one rule that works in every calamity. Be it pestilence, war, or famine, the rich get richer and poor get poorer. The poor even help arrange it.
If you don't like the weather in Oklahoma, wait a minute and it'll change.
Old Hollywood is just like a desert water in Africa. Hang around long enough and every kind of animal in the world will drift in for refreshments.
I am just an old country boy in a big town trying to get along. I have been eating pretty regular and the reason I have been is because I have stayed an old country boy.
Ohio claims they are due a president as they haven't had one since Taft. Look at the United States, they have not had one since Lincoln.
There's only one thing that can kill the movies, and that's education.
Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
Always drink upstream from the herd.
There is no more interesting place in the world to meet characters than a movie set.
If you can build a business up big enough, it's respectable.
It would drive a person crazy to dope out really what does divide the two parties. Prosperity don't divide the two parties, for under either administration the poor get poorer and the rich get richer.
I never mewt a man I didn't like.
We always want the best man to win an election. Unfortunately, he never runs.
Last year we said, 'Things can't go on like this', and they didn't, they got worse.
If you ever injected truth into politics you have no politics.
Don't wait to buy land, Buy land and wait. Find out where the people are going and buy the land before they get there.
Rotation of crops and less automobiles will relieve the farmers whenever they decide to try it.
Eventually you reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
Don't be misled by History, or any other unreliable source.
Popularity is the easiest thing in the world to gain and it is the hardest thing to hold.
Both gangs have been bad sports, so see if at least one can't redeem themselves by offering no alibis, but cooperate with the winner, for no matter which one it is the poor fellow is going to need it.
The minute a thing is long and complicated, it confuses. Whoever wrote the Ten Commandments made 'em short. They may not always be kept, but they are understood.
Things in our country run in spite of government, not by aid of it.
I bet you, if I had met Trotsky, and had had a chat with him, I would have found him a very interesting and human fellow, for I have never yet met a man I didn't like.
Successful colleges will start laying plans for a new stadium; unsuccessful ones will start hunting a new coach.
A man who dies without adequate life insurance should have to come back and see the mess he created.
It will take America fifteen years of steady taking care of our own business and letting everybody else's alone, to get us back to where everybody speaks to us again.
I don't think you can make a lawyer honest by an act of legislature. You've got to work on his conscience. And his lack of conscience is what makes him a lawyer.
There will never be a time when the old horse is not superior to any auto ever made.
Take the diplomacy out of war and the thing would fall flat in a week.
See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails.
Every man gets an opportunity once in a lifetime.
Every man is ignorant -- just on different subjects.
People's minds are changed through observation and not through argument.
There is two types of Larceny, Petty and Grand. They are supposed to be the same in the eyes of the law, but judges always put a little extra on you for Petty, which is kind of a fine for stupidness.
Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.
President Coolidge said, 'I don't want the Government to go into business.' Well, if I was Mr. Coolidge I wouldn't worry over that. The Government never has been accused of being a business man.
Money, horse racing and women: three things the boys just can't figure out.
The nation is prosperous on the whole, but how much prosperity is there in a hole?
After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him... The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
A conference is just an admission that you want somebody to join you in your troubles.
Never slap a man who is chewing tobacco.
Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
And if you call one a real estate agent and he won't sell you anything. He is a REALATOR. It's the same as what the old fashioned real estate agent used to be only the commission is different.
A debt is just as hard for a Government to pay as it is for an individual. No debt ever comes due at a good time. Borrowing is the only thing that seems handy all the time.
We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.
The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.
Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
lEven if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. Opportunity rarely knocks on your door. Knock rather on opportunity's door if you ardently wish to enter.
Elections are a good deal like marriages. There's no accounting for anyone's taste. Every time we see a bridegroom we wonder why she ever picked him, and it's the same with public officials.
I don't care how poor and inefficient a little country is -- they like to run their own business. I know men that would -make my wife a better husband than I am but, darn it, I'm not going to give her to 'em.
If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.
Politicians are just a bunch of local bandits, sent by their local voters to raid the public treasury.
No nation ever had two better friends that we have. You know who they are? The Atlantic and Pacific oceans.
A man that don't love a horse, there is something the matter with him.
If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.
How is the government going to get the extra taxes? Out of the rich, or just out of the poor, as usual?
Farmers have more Associations, and Bureaus, and Clubs, than they have pitchforks.
A senator got up today in Congress and called his fellow senators sons of wild jackasses. Now, if you think the senators were hot, imagine how the jackasses must feel.
There is a tremendous movement on to get lower taxes on earned incomes. Then will come the real problem, 'Who among us on salary are earning our income?'
People don't change under governments. Governments change. People remain the same.
Conferences are just like the poor and the Democrats, they will always be with us.
I have always said that a conference was held for one reason only, to give everybody a chance to get sore at everybody else. Sometimes it takes two or three conferences to scare up a war, but generally one will do it.
I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.
Too many people spend money they earned to buy things they don't want to impress people that they don't like.
There ain't nothing that breaks up homes, country and nations like somebody publishing their memoirs.
The best way to make a fire with two sticks is to make sure one of them is a match.
Us middle class...never have to worry about having old furniture to point out to our friends. We buy it on payments and before it's paid for it's plenty antique.
Live your life so that whenever you lose, you are ahead.
Don't raise anything, except what fits your appetite. Then the price don't worry you. Just raise all you can eat and let the low prices go by.
A comedian can only last till he either takes himself serious or his audience takes him serious.
Golf is good for the soul. You get so mad at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.
There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
It is a good thing that we do not get as much government as we pay for.
In Hollywood the woods are full of people that learned to write but evidently can't read. If they could read their stuff, they'd stop writing.
With all our crime and all our immorality ... and about as much contentment and respose as a fresh-caged hyena, we go to tell the whole world: we are the only one with the right idea!
The US is safest when Congress is in recess.
Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?
It's the greatest game I ever saw. You can't lose. Everybody buys to sell and nobody buys to keep. What's worrying me is who is going to be the last owner. It's just like an auction; the only one stuck is the last one.
What the Secretary of Agriculture is trying to do is to teach the farmer corn acreage control, and the hogs birth control, and one is just as hard to make understand it as the other.
Never miss a chance to shut up.
There's two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.
Banking and after-dinner speaking are two of the most nonessential industries we have in this country. I am ready to reform, if they are.
In Europe public men do resign. But here it's a lost art. You have to impeach 'em.
You can't fool all of the people all of the time. But it isn't necessary.
The Democrats are going to change the name of the Hoover Dam. That is the silliest thing I ever heard of in politics ... Lord if they feel that way about it, I don't see why they don't just reverse the two words.
That's the trouble with our charities; we are always saving somebody away off, when the fellow next to us ain't eating.
I represent what is left of a vanishing race, and that is the pedestrian. That I am still able to be here, I owe to a keen eye and a nimble pair of legs. But I know they'll get me someday.
If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.
I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him father.
I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
Government investigations have always contributed more to our amusement than they have to our knowledge.
Samuel Gompers has spent his life trying to keep labor from working too hard and has succeeded beyond his wildest dreams.
Shrewdness in public life all over the world is always honored, while honesty in public men is generally attributed to dumbness and is seldom rewarded.
Alexander Hamilton originated the put and take system in our national treasury: the taxpayers put it in, and the politicians take it out.
If we could just go back the last two or three years and do our buying a little more carefully, why... we would be O.K.
Senators are a never-ending source of amusement, amazement, and discouragement.
They used to take your horse and if they were caught they got hung for it. Now they take your car, and if they are caught it's a miracle.
The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.
The good old horse-and-buggy days: then you lived until you died and not until you were run over.
Many a politician wishes there was a law to burn old records.
I see where we are starting to pay some attention to our neighbors to the south. We could never understand why Mexico wasn't just crazy about us, for we have always had their good will, and oil and minerals, at heart.
The short memories of the American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.
When you put down the good things you ought to have done, and leave out the bad ones you did do well, that's Memoirs.
I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
The Republicans have their splits right after election and Democrats have theirs just before an election.
I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this -- no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.
Government spending? I don't know what it's all about. I don't know any more about this thing than an economist does, and, God knows, he doesn't know much.
When you are satisfied, you are successful. For that's all there is to success is satisfaction.
Civilization has taught us to eat with a fork, but even now if nobody is around we use our fingers.
We can't all be heroes, because somebody has to sit on the curb and applaud when they go by.
The American people are a very generous people and will forgive almost any weakness, with the possible, exception of stupidity.
The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf.
The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don't know when it's through if you are a crook or a martyr.
If you feel the urge, don't be afraid to go on a wild goose chase. What do you think wild geese are for anyway?
I hope we never live to see the day when a thing is as bad as some of our newspapers make it.
A president just can't make much showing against congress. They lay awake nights, thinking up things to be against the president on.
If you get to thinking you're a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else's dog around.
Coolidge is a better example of evolution than either Bryan or Darrow, for he knows when not to talk, which is the biggest asset the monkey possesses over the human.
This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer.
I remember when being liberal meant being generous with your own money.
The Republicans have a habit of having three bad years and one good one, and the good one always happens to be election years.
On prohibiting anybody from learning anything: Why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth.
When should a college athlete turn pro? Not until he has earned all he can in college as an amateur.
We are always yapping about the 'Good Old Days' and how we look back and enjoy it, but I tell you there is a lot of hooey to it. There is a whole lot of all our past lives that wasn't so hot.
A liberal is a man who wants to use his own ideas on things in preference to generations who, he knows, know more than he does.
All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance.
It rained in the Middle West. Farmers are learning that the relief they get from the sky beats what they get from Washington.
We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can.
Our country has plenty of five-cent cigars, but the trouble is they charge fifteen cents for them.
These dust storms.... Poor farmer spent a lifetime fixin' his farm and everything, goes out and looks down at it, and it's up above him.
A vision, without a plan, is just a hallucination.
Noah must have taken into the Ark two taxes, one male and one female. And did they multiply bountifully! Next to guinea pigs, taxes must have been the most prolific animals.
The South is dry and will vote dry. That is, everybody that is sober enough to stagger to the polls will.
We are sure living in a peculiar time. You get morefor not working than you will for working, and morefor not raising a hog than for raising it.
Being a hero is about the shortest-lived profession on earth.
If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?
Strangers are just friends I haven't met yet.
When ignorance gets started it knows no bounds.
There is nothing fairer than workmen having unions of their mutual benefit.
Mothers are the only race of people that speak the same tongue. A mother in Manchuria could converse with a mother in Nebraska and never miss a word.
Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't have to advertise it.
Both political parties have their good times and bad times, only they have them at different times.
Lobbyists have more offices in Washington than the President. You see, the President only tells Congress what they should do. Lobbyists tell'em what they will do.
We don't give our criminals much punishment, but we sure give 'em plenty of publicity.
Communism is like prohibition, it is a good idea, but it won't work.
The old horse is coming back in a high lope. Thousands of people are riding a horse today that five years ago couldn't sit in a Ford with all the doors locked.
Every day you meet a delegation going to some convention to try and change the way of somebody else's life.
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your back pocket.
There is no more independence in politics than there is in jail.
I was born because it was a habit in those days, people didn't know anything else.
In time of crisis people want to know that you care, more than they care what you know.
The Supreme Court is divided almost in half on the decisions. Talk about an international court. How would we ever agree with a lot of foreigners when we can't even agree among our own judges?
The government says they have loaned over One Billion dollars to the Farmers. In other words, we can't help you make any money, but we will show you where you can owe some more.
America is a nation that conceives many odd inventions for getting somewhere but it can think of nothing to do once it gets there.
When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.
The movies are the only business where you can go out front and applaud yourself.
You got to do more than just live in the country to be a Farmer.
One Ad is worth more to a paper than forty Editorials.
When everybody has got money they cut taxes, and when they're broke they raise 'em. That's statesmanship of the highest order.
If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.
The business of government is to keep the government out of business -- that is, unless business needs government aid.
The time to save is now. When a dog gets a bone, he doesn't go out and make a down payment on a bigger bone. He buries the one he's got.
There are two things that I don't care how smart you are, you will never understand. One is an alienist's testimony and the other is a railroad timetable.
The bankers just got a good cussing by everybody for loaning too much money. Well, they got some awful nice buildings. So when a banker fails, he fails in splendor.
You never know how much a man can't remember until he is called as a witness.
Well, the disarmament conference is off to a flying start. There is nothing to prevent their succeeding now but human nature.
One way to solve the traffic problem is to keep all the cars that are not paid for off the streets.
The schools ain't what they used to be and never was.
Cattlemen have lost more in the last few years than anybody and say less about it.
Rail-splitting produced an immortal president in Lincoln, but golf hasn't produced even a good Congressman.
It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.
I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons.
The United States never lost a war or won a conference.
The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if you don't let it get the best of you.
You should never try and teach a pig to read for two reasons. First, it's impossible; and secondly, it annoys the hell out of the pig!.
Lead your life so you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip.
Take me ham away, take away my eggs, even my Chili, but leave me my newspaper.
If you make any money, the government shoves you in the creek once a year with it in your pockets, and all that don't get wet you can keep.
I doubt if a charging elephant, or a rhino, is as determined or hard to check as a socially ambitious mother.
If we have Senators and Congressmen there that can't protect themselves against the evil temptations of lobbyists, we don't need to change our lobbies, we need to change our representatives.
Congress is going to start tinkering with the Ten Commandments just as soon as they find someone in Washington who has read them.
Does college pay? They do if you are a good open-field runner.
There are two things that can disrupt business in this country. One is War, and the other is a meeting of the Federal Reserve Bank.
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
America is becoming so educated that ignorance will be a novelty. I will belong to a select few.
If you eliminate the names of Lincoln, Washington, Roosevelt, Jackson and Wilson, both conventions would get out three days earlier.
Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.
What would we say if the Chinese sent a gunboat with their marines up the Mississippi River claiming they were protecting their laundries in Memphis?
Lord, the money we do spend on Government and it's not one bit better than the government we got for one-third the money twenty years ago.
A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries.
I maintain that it should cost as much to get married as to get divorced. Make it look like marriage is worth as much as divorce, even if it ain't.
I will never joke about old soldiers who try to get to reunions to talk over the war again. To talk of old times with old friends is the greatest thing in the world.
I traveled a good deal all over the world, and I got along pretty good in all these foreign countries, for I have a theory that it's their country and they got a right to run it like they want to.
The man that found the 726-carat diamond in Africa, received $350,000 for it and wants to buy a farm and silk hat. Well, I can understand a man perhaps being eccentric enough to want to own a silk hat.
There is not a better day in the world to be spent than with a lot of wise old cowmen around barbecued beef, black coffee and good "free holy" beans.
I don't think either one of them knows what it's all about, to be honest with you. Both sides are doing nothing but just looking towards the next election.
Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.
The more that learn to read the less learn how to make a living. That's one thing about a little education. It spoils you for actual work. The more you know the more you think somebody owes you a living.
When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.
What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.
Farmers have about given up hope of getting farm relief and have decided to fertilize instead.
In the Middle West now you got to put a brand on your soil, then in the Spring go on a round-up looking for it.
Man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.
Baseball is a skilled game. It's America's game -- it, and high taxes.
Plans get you into things, but you got to work your way out.
Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock.
There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.
You can't legislate intelligence and common sense into people.
The farmer has to be an optimist or he wouldn't still be a farmer.
Labor Day, I suppose set by an Act of Congress. Everything we do nowadays is either by, or against, Acts of Congress. How Congress knew anything about Labor is beyond us.
Funny to watch these Senators switching back and forth on Prohibition. Politics is a great character builder. You have to take a referendum to see what your convictions are for that day.
The man with the best job in the country is the vice-president. All he has to do is get up every morning and say, 'How is the president?'
Democrats are the only reason to vote for Republicans.
I was born on Nov. 4, which is Election Day... my birthday has made more men, and sent more back to honest work, than any of the other days in the year.
I guess truth can hurt you worse in an election than about anything that can happen to you.
Never let yesterday use up too much of today.
Every Gag I tell must be based on truth. No matter how much I may exaggerate it, it must have a certain amount of Truth.... Now Rumor travels Faster, but it don't stay put as long as Truth.
Foreign relations is an open book -- generally a checkbook.
An onion can make people cry, but there has never been a vegetable invented to make them laugh.
Believe in something for another world, but don't be too set on what it is, and then you won't start out that life with a disappontment. Live your life so that whenever you lose you are ahead.
I see where they are going to be more strict with these robbers; when they catch 'em from now on, they're going to publish their names.
Under capitalism man exploits man; under socialism the reverse is true.
A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.
Candidates have been telling you that if elected they would 'pull you from this bog hole of financial misery.' Now is a good chance to get even with 'em, by electing 'em, just to prove what a liar they are.
Our whole Depression was brought on by gambling, not in the stock market alone but in expanding and borrowing and going in debt... all just to make some easy money quick.
There is two things that can disrupt business in this country. One is War, and the other is a meeting of the Federal Reserve Bank.
We are all ignorant. We are just ignorant about different things.
Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.
You know no nation has a monopoly on good things, each one has something that the others could well afford to adopt.
You never get a second chance to make a first impression.
There are two things I don't care how smart you are, you will never understand. One is an alienist's testimony, and the other is a railroad timetable.
People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.
You give us long enough to argue over something and we will bring you in proofs to show that the Ten Commandments should never be ratified.
There ought to be one day -- just one -- when there is open season on senators.
It takes a lifetime to build a good reputation, but you can lose it in a minute.
An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.
Mona Lisa is the only beauty who went through history and retained her reputation.
A holding company is a thing where you hand an accomplice the goods while the policeman searches you.
The farmers can be thankful. Didn't the Farm Board decide in Washington last week that they could have cheaper interest? All the farmers have to do now is to find something new to put up as security.
Political elections are a good deal like marriages, there's no accounting for anyone's taste.
There have been three great inventions since the beginning of time: fire, the wheel, and central banking.
If Wall Street paid a tax on every "game" they run, we would get enough revenue to run the government on.
Nothing you can't spell will ever work.
Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.
I can remember way back when a liberal was one who was generous with his money.
People love high ideals, but they got to be about 33-percent plausible.
I wonder if it isn't just cowardice instead of generosity that makes us give tips.
Prosperity this Winter is going to be enjoyed by everybody that is fortunate enough to get into the poor farm.
The country has gone sane and got back to horses.
There is nothing as easy as denouncing. It don't take much to see that something is wrong, but it does take some eyesight to see what will put it right again.
The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Farmers, get out your sense of humor. Congress meets to relieve you again next week.
The Schools ain't what they used to be and never was.
Parades should be classed as a nuisance and participants should be subject to a term in prison.
Parades should be classed as a Nuisance and participants should be subject to a term in prison. They stop more work, inconvenience more people, stop more traffic, cause more accidents, entail more expense, and commit and cause I don't remember the other hundred misdemeanors.
The only real diplomacy ever performed by a diplomat is in deceiving their own people after their dumbness has got them into a war.
Personally, I have always felt that the best doctor in the world is the Veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter...he's just got to know.
Any person that don't read at least one well-written country newspaper is not truly informed.
You know you've got to exercise your brain just like your muscles.
This session of Congress is also to relieve the farmer again, relieve him of any encouragement that he might have received during the last one.
After seeing kids play polo against big guys, it only shows that horses are the greatest equalizer in the world. No matter what you weigh, the little fellow is your equal on a horse.
There is something about riding on a prancing horse that makes you feel like something, even when you aint worth a thing.
You can't legitimately kick on income tax, for it's on what you have made. You have already made it. But, look at land, farms, homes, stores, vacant lots. You pay year after year on them whether you make it or not.
There's no way in the world you're going to make a political party respectable unless you keep it out of office.
Now if there is one thing that we do worse than any other nation, it is try and manage somebody else's affairs.
Politics is applesauce.
Asking Europe to disarm is like asking a man in Chicago to give up his life insurance.
You know, everybody's ignorant, just on different subjects.
Buy land. They ain't making any more of the stuff.
Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.
Every time somebody has thought of relief for the farmer it has been to make it so he could borrow more money. What he needs is some way to pay back. Not some way to borrow more.
It's one of the most progressive cities in the world. Shooting is only a sideline.
If the other fellow sells cheaper than you, it is called dumping. 'Course, if you sell cheaper than him, that's mass production.'
Everyone is a self-made man. Only the successful admit it.
So let's be honest with ourselves and not take ourselves too serious, and never condemn the other fellow for doing what we are doing every day, only in a different way.
On account of being a democracy and run by the people, we are the only nation in the world that has to keep a government four years, no matter what it does.
You shake a slogan at an American and it's just like showing a hungry dog a bone.
Everyone is ignorant only on different subjects.
The budget is a mythical bean bag. Congress votes mythical beans into it, and then tries to reach in and pull real beans out.
Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as well as prohibition did, in five years Americans would be the smartest race of people on Earth.
Pain is such an uncomfortable feeling that even a tiny amount of it is enough to ruin every enjoyment.
I'm not against (bull fighting). Some nations like to see blood, and some like to see their victims suffer from speculation... They kill the bull very quick. Wall Street lets you live and suffer.
If you are trying to get out of the hole, stop digging.
Congress knew Coolidge would veto the farm bill. There was more politics than relief in that bill.
There is a fine breed for you, Irish-Indian. My family crest would be a Shillalah with a Tomahawk on one end.
Real estate is the best investment in the world because it is the only thing they're not making any more.
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else, but when it happens to you, why it seems to lose some of its Humor, and if it keeps on happening, why the entire laughter kinder Fades out of it.
It looks like the financial giants of the world have bungled as much as the diplomats and politicians. This would be a great time in the world for some man to come along that knew something.
You have to have a serious streak in you, or you can't see the funny side of the other fellow.
Rumor travels faster, but it don't stay put as long as truth.
If all politicians fished instead of spoke publicly, we would be at peace with the world.
There's a simple solution to our traffic problems. We'll have business build the roads, and government build the cars.
We do more talking progress than we do progressing.
I haven't seen a tractor working all day. The country has gone sane and got back to horses. Farmers all look worse, but they feel better.